Vengeance Is Mine Inc.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

TTOW! I got the nac job. Which weirdly or not weirdly makes me look forward to being a waitress for 2 more weeks. Maybe on my last day hardly anyone besides the managers will know it's my last day and I'll slip away mysteriously, just someone who once worked there, was once in it, never to return except to eat there and have food orders taken by people I once almost knew, but didn't and not near almost anyway. Dr. Evil laugh. Speaking of which WHERE IS AUSTIN POWERS????? Oh appear in the morning I want to watch mini-me turn psychotic like a dog with rabies clawing at Scott (Dr. Evil's son) after eating CHOCOLATE. Yummy mad mini-me. I want to have an austin powers dream before I die. I could be married to Scott in it, and Dr. Evil would be my father-in-law and mini-me my mini-father-in-law. Scott and I would have matching blue and red mohawks and we'd betray Dr. Evil, Frau and mini-me to help Austin Powers, my uncle-in-law, since at the end of Goldmember Dr. Evil and Austin Powers turned out to be brothers and they hugged and jumped and giggled wide-eyed open-mouthed slow-motion to orchestral music.

The most romantic books I've ever read (my favourites are the boyish ones like catch-22 or catcher in the rye or on the road, but everyone in the world needs to read romantic books):
The Collector by John Fowles,
Behind the scenes at the museum by Kate Atkinson
and a surprise- So Long, and Thanks For All the Fish (book 4 of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series)

(Most of the book isn't even like the following, but here it is. Arthur Dent finally finds Fenny, and I keep thinking she'll morph into Trillian)

He hadn't realized that life speaks with a voice to you, a voice that brings you answers to the questions you continually ask of it, had never consciously detected it or recognized its tones until it now said something it had never said to him before, which was "yes".

(this other bit from the first book, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

Vogon poetry is of course the third worst in the Universe. The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem "Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning" four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging, and the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been "disappointed" by the poem's reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled My Favorite Bathtime Gurgles when his own major intestine, in a desperate attempt to save life and civilization, leaped straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.

moled at 5/16/2006 07:37:00 AM

be a goldmember.
i can see into your past, madame mary.

HELLO, STRANGER! Zach Braff