Wednesday, February 09, 2005
She's meeting some biker men. Big ones. Full of sperm.
I just counted my money and I am thrilled and delighted by the results. I love smelling the crisp smooth notes, which, I must emphasize, are now mine. The more I counted and the more I smelt the madder I got. It all drives me a bit crazy.
Yesterday I put into words a thought which my brain has been thinking for about a year. It is that I am always unconsciously dying to watch the parent trap. Very, very odd. I always want to watch it, because I watched it when i was about 12 and I loved it and it was at that time i liked the idea of twins and there were 2 freckled twins in the movie, with songs like L-O-V-E and pina coladas and the handshake and a sunny summer camp where girls do naughty things at night and peirce each others' ears and stay in cabins and later a wet english city where people walk around in trenchcoats and use black shiny umbrellas. In a way the movie has affected the way I view things. Oh, am i dying to watch it!
Yesterday I watched 10 things I hate about you, again. And then I watched american idol and the amazing race 2-hour season finale!!!! rebecca loves adam!!!!!!! freddy and kendra won!!!! freddy always wears thick big black specs or john lennon specs and kendra always wears a purple top and they always wear bandanas! kris & jon are finally not so annoying. aaron proposed to hayden after they decided to give up on the road block (opening 1 lock among 3000 with a key they were given) and aaron got so mad he almost flung his backpack off mount hua in xi'an. and she said 'of course i'll marry you!' it's amazing because they were always first throughout the race and then they gave up but then they are very happy. rebecca says adam will always be in her heart. she is the little monkey and he is horny hellboy. anyhow, he skydived!!!!!!! it's amazing because he is a weird person whom i think stays home playing games a lot and loves his mother a lot (he always shouts 'i love you mum!!!! i love my mother!!!!!' rather irrelevantly when doing extreme sports roadblocks) and he says the whole race got him out of his comfort zone, obviously with rebecca's help.
In the last scene of 10 things i hate about you, the band Letters To Cleo is playing on the rooftop of the school, which looks like a brown castle with turquiose peaks and the rooftop is bare except for them and their instruments and microphone stands, almost as if they were planted there. and the camera revolves slowly around them singing 'i want you to want me'. They all wear black but in an interesting way. The lead singer has short messy blonde hair and is wearing a simple black dress to her knees with tattoos and possibly an ankle bracelet. Movies always save the world.
OILILY EAU DE TOILETTE
moled at 2/09/2005 06:44:00 PM
Here comes the sun
It is another hot afternoon on the first day of Chinese new year!
I LOVE chinese new year. I got $520 yesterday night even before today came. For reunion dinner we had my favourite soup and then I lazed around, slept, woke up, changed to my 50s red and white dress and we went out. the worst part was going to the cemetery. i'd love to go there alone, but i hate going with my family. the worst part is looking at my grandfather's photo on the tomb. when that was finally done, we went to visit 4 old people relatives. 1 was sitting alone in a room with a tube up her nose, immobile and just looking around not recognising anyone. 1 had a lot of wobbly cheeks and kept rejecting hongbaos. her son was past 50 and seemed so lonely and said bye to us like a little boy. 1 was more sane and is my grandfather's older brother. he is very fat now. 1 gave out hongbaos sitting on a chair with furry black eyebrows, smiling and thrusting out his hand like a little boy. all in all, an odd morning. in a few years they will all be dead.
A nice bit of chinese new year mornings are the long drives from house to house. we sit in my uncle's car, this year my sister and i sat in the back while my uncle drove an my auntie sat in front. they have no children but i hope everyday that they do. he could do with one. he has brown eyes and is a colonel and looks like a jc boy. we'll just be on the expressways, it is sunny and we'd listen to energetic chinese music and cruise along, just waiting for the next destination, where for the adults is the promise of meeting their beloved relatives, and for us, the promise of food and chrysanthemum tea and longan tea and more hongbaos.
We came home, went to my mother's mother's house, had lunch and quickly came home where my er gu, uncle pepe, ting han, natalie, ting shann and the baby were!!!!!!! the baby was so vain and wore a light purple qipao that went to her ankles. we have the same hairstyle now, a straight fringe, except her hair is immensely straight. she is so vain. we all took divine photos, all of us cousins, in the sun with the red and yellow flowers. and then she made me take about 10 more photos of her in her sister's big mary-jane shoes, and then she giggled when she saw the photos and wanted more. the other cousins were playing computer games obsessively. a lot of people were at our house, just these relatives who gave me their money, but anyhow, i like them. i like it when there are a lot of people in our house. da kor kor came too, he's my favourite distant relative. when we were young, every chinese new year he would come to the playroom (my room now) and he would give ah zhe and i riddles and we'd fight to answer and it was the highlight of our day, meeting him. now, he's married. and even more unbelievable, he has a baby girl. this year was the first year we tried to talk and couldn't say much and he asked me what i want to be when i grow up and as i had thought about it this morning i said astronaut, writer, backpacker, retro cafe owner, scuba diving instructor, event planner or disneyland/movieworld/dreamworld attendant. and his wife said i'm living in an airy fairy world. after a while, he left and it was unspoken but we both felt quite sad that we didn't have a good chat, at all.
it is so sunny! this morning i remembered that very long ago, before my grandfather died, every chinese new year, he'd go visiting with us! it's obvious, but i just remembered. in the past, for many years, those 4 old people relatives we visit all stayed at fixed houses, now, they've all moved. we would first go to the wobbly cheek woman's house, we wouldn't even have to go to the cemetery first. this morning i remembered that i loved going there, it was a very old and odd and filthy yet grand sort of house, very brown and with huge dogs. it had a lot of incense smell and brown antique furniture and he son, this man we call leilei, was still staying there, unmarried, and when we went a lot of her children would wake up in that ancient house, and that 50 year old plus son didn't seem so lonely then. now his eyes are always so watery. when we went to my grandfather's brother's house, my grandfather would chat with him and make my sister, a baby then, play with his brother and trick her that the brother was him.
i haven't yet asked anyone about why they would give money to someone they barely know or care about. you have to choose the right person for this sort of question, not just any narrow-minded, idiotic auntie who will give a fake laugh, put her horrid hand on my arm and saunter away with her big saggy butt sticking out. very sensitive question. i almost feel mad when i bring it up. i will ask my father's friend, i think. but i know just what he will say. 'wah, say cheong, hue boey, your daughter ah, ask me a very interesting question. why i give her hongbao.' and he will ramble on.
OH!!!! just now a whole group of people came, my grandmother's nieces and their 20-something children!!!!!!! last year, one of the 20-something sons went to shit and his cousins made a big deal of it, and one of them thought i was 30-something!!!!!!! receiving hongbaos is so contrived!!!!! when they look in their handbags, you know the moment is coming. then when they give it to your siblings, you know you are next. you look around, look at food, pretending not to notice, and when they come you go 'oh! thank you!' and take it. EW. EVEN WORSE, IS WISHING ANYONE A HAPPY NEW YEAR. every time new people appear, people go 'happy new year!' and shake hands!!!!! that is so stupid!!!!!!!!! it isn't even really a new year, or at least they should say happy chinese new year, and they want to shake my hand even though at that moment i try to look like a kid. i do feel like slapping them and twisting their buttocks till they cry pathetically and can't say happy new year, ever again.
whatever it is, i love the sun and i only want my favourite relatives at my wedding and there is the amazing race 2-hour season finale tonight. no one believes that i can quit school now and have my 5 children. i do feel like pouring acid on people sometimes. have a sunny yolk golden and very, very red day my friends.
moled at 2/09/2005 12:19:00 AM
